5 Tips to Habits that Fit Your Life Now
Positive habits result in a sweet sense of satisfaction. Are your habits doing that for you? If not, it might be time to strengthen the routines you want to keep and toss the ones that no longer serve you.
Positive habits result in a sweet sense of satisfaction. Are your habits doing that for you? If not, it might be time to strengthen the routines you want to keep and toss the ones that no longer serve you.
This is personal for me. My habits have changed dramatically to fit a 35-year corporate career, two years of traveling by motorcycle in Latin America, and three years of running a business. Each of those areas required very different routines. I bet your helpful habits have changed over the years, too.
I continually get better at seeing how my habits work for me and against me. Recently I asked myself, “How do I fortify the habits that are helping me so I can more easily reach my desired outcomes?” That question lit my curiosity.
As my awareness of habits has increased, I’ve come to believe that whether we’re aware of them or not, they’re a powerful force in our lives. Now, I want to see and use them. I want my habits to bring me feelings of accomplishment, satisfaction, and joy!
If you’re curious about your habits, here are some places to begin honing them.
Start with stopping.
What habits are no longer serving you? They might be left over from another time in your life. Maybe you started doing them unconsciously and, although you know they’re not helping, you’re having trouble unhooking from them.
One of the habits that I’ve stopped is related to taking breaks. My habit was to never take a break at work. Almost all the time, I would eat lunch at my desk, while working on the computer, and not take morning or afternoon breaks.
Thanks to my coach, I stopped that habit. She helped me see that taking breaks actually increased my productivity. Now, I take morning and afternoon breaks, usually with a healthy snack, plus a lunch hour which typically involves eating while listening to a podcast and then listening to a guided meditation.
This habit took time to change. Initially I felt like a loafer! Slowly I noticed a shift. My belief changed from “no breaks means I’m a hard worker” to “breaks mean I’m a smart, productive worker taking care of myself so I don’t burnout.”
How are beliefs connected with habits?
I believed that not taking breaks proved I was working hard. I thought working more hours meant I would be more successful. Now I believe that when I take better care of myself, I do better work which leads to more meaningful success.
Which comes first, the habit change or the belief change? That’s like asking, “Which came first, the chicken or the egg?” It could go either way. In my example of breaks, first I changed the habit and then my new belief hatched.
Choose what you want first.
Snazzy new habits will lose steam fast if they’re not truly hooked-up with your desires. So, “What do you want?” That’s a simple question and yet so tough to answer sometimes.
The reason I focused on taking breaks as a habit was because I wanted to build a business in which I could take care of myself rather than burning out like I’d done in the past.
I suggest starting simple. What’s one thing you want? Play with creating one habit related to it. Here’s a trick for making habits stick. Build a habit chain by connecting a new habit to a current one. For example, while drinking coffee in the morning (current habit) write in your journal (new habit) or, when you first sit down at your desk (current), take time to plan your day (new). A habit chain will make new habits easier to start and stick to.
What do you want to learn more about before creating a new habit?
I’ve found that sometimes I don’t know what habit will help me. In that case, learning a new perspective, approach, or process is what guides me toward a new habit.
For example, in the taking a break scenario, my coach introduced the new perspective that breaks lead to increased productivity. Right now, I’m trying out a time-blocking approach I learned from the book Indistractable: How to Control Your Attention and Choose Your Life. I’m also experimenting with a process for connecting with potential new clients. All of those areas will be stronger with good habits.
K.I.S.S. = Keep It Simple Sweetie
When I’m at my best, I keep things simple rather than complex. Imagine one area of your life that you truly want to make better. Use the tips above to choose one habit that you’re pretty sure will move you closer to what you want. Try it for an appropriate time period. If it works, continue doing it. If it doesn’t work, try a different habit.
You get to be in charge of the habits that you stop and start doing. By noticing them, you can choose to let go of those getting in your way and fortify the ones that will move you toward what you desire. What’s one simple habit that you’ll commit to taking for a test run? I’d love to cheer you on! Send me an email to Jalene@JaleneCase.com.
Your Body as a Decision-Making Power Tool
Plugging into our bodies’ way of communicating is like using a decision-making power tool. It quickly drills to the core. Whether we’re struggling to make tiny, seemingly inconsequential choices or gigantic, clearly life-changing decisions, our bodies know the answer first.
By Jalene Case
Plugging into our bodies’ way of communicating is like using a decision-making power tool. It quickly drills to the core. Whether we’re struggling to make tiny, seemingly inconsequential choices or gigantic, clearly life-changing decisions, our bodies know the answer first.
It’s easy to rush through life without taking time to notice our physical sensations. In fact we often try to actively ignore our bodies by not listening to their plea for sleep, urge to move, or hunger for good food. Feel familiar?
That denial of our bodies’ voice also shows up in our decision-making process. For example, have you ever made a list of pros and cons to help you make a choice and, more often than not, ended up in analysis-paralysis? Did you feel that even though there were more pros on the list, you wanted to make the opposite choice? Interpreting what our bodies are trying to tell us is more than a gut-feeling-style approach.
Health expert Dr. Christiane Northrup sums it up well, “Our inner guidance comes to us through our feelings and body wisdom first — not through intellectual understanding.”
Here are some ways to practice connecting with your body’s wisdom as a tool in the decision-making process.
Feeling Yes and No
Think back to a time when you made a memorable decision. The instant you chose, did you feel something in your body, such as a cold clenching in your gut or a flood of warm relief in your chest? Paying attention to your body grounds you, brings you into the present, and is a pathway for listening to your inner wisdom.
Read through these steps and then close your eyes and go through the process:
Ground your feet firmly on the floor and take a deep breath into your belly. Let the rest of the world drift away. Breathe naturally for a few breaths and feel your body’s sensations. Where do you feel tension, pain, tingles, or warmth? Simply notice. You don’t need to do anything right now. Relax. Bring all your energy to this moment.
Bring a question into your mind and feel the answer in your body. For example, you may be deciding whether to accept a job.
Imagine what your life would look and feel like if you said yes to the job. Include every detail you can imagine with your senses. Imagine what you’re wearing, the location of the job, the work you’ll be doing, the people you’ll be around, the scent of the place, the taste, the colors. Imagine yourself in the world you created by saying yes to this decision.
Notice what you feel in your body. Where do you feel it? Is there tension? A warmth? A tingle? A glow? A knot? Does it feel like a yes or a no?
Next, imagine saying no to the job and go through the same process. After feeling the yes and the no in your body, which choice feels right for you at this moment?
Flip to Choose
In a similar vein, a co-worker, Mindy, taught me a different twist on feeling your way to a decision. Think about the choice you’re facing and then flip a coin. Imagine that heads means yes and tails means no. Look at the result and immediately notice what you wish the coin had revealed. Therein lies your heart’s true desire for the answer.
Emotional Vocabulary
“How do you feel?” can be a simple and yet, vexing question. It’s easy to respond with good, bad, mad, happy, sad, and even, “I don’t know.” Add to that our common business culture of not revealing feelings. Naming our emotions becomes tricky! However, connecting more specifically with how we’re feeling can help us see the nuances of a decision more clearly.
Dr. Brené Brown is in the process of researching emotional literacy. I imagine this will help us recognize our feelings more precisely by expanding the words we use to describe them. For example, describing how we feel as overwhelmed instead of simply tired or worried instead of mad. The words we use can often change the context of the situation and, as a result our actions.
Write to Feel
Bring a particular situation to mind. Start with the prompt of, “I feel…” and then write for five minutes without stopping. You might include the physical location of sensations in your body, and a description or metaphor that illustrates how it feels. Often the process of writing will bring clarity to the words swirling around in your mind and the feelings emanating from your body.
Mindfully Feel
This is my favorite quick connection to my body’s voice. Go to a private place in which you’ll be comfortable closing your eyes for a minute.
Close your eyes. Put your hand on your heart. Take a deep breath.
Notice the feeling of your hand on your body, and your feet on the ground or your bottom on the seat.
Bring a situation to mind, perhaps a pending decision. Internally ask yourself, “How am I feeling?” Immediately notice the physical sensations that come. People hear their body in different ways so simply notice what happens for you. There is no right or wrong way to listen to your body. How do you interpret what you hear?
Heeding our bodies’ wisdom takes practice, like any skill we want to improve. Choose one of the methods above (or create your own!) and practice listening to what your body has to share about your next decision.
I would love to hear what works for you. Please send me a note at Jalene@JaleneCase.com.
With my monthly blog posts, I dig into topics related to leading ourselves so we can get what matters most done.
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